What's a Yoda?
by Accio Draco Malfoy
Summary: Harry and Draco go shopping, i know its been done to death, but this is based on something that happened to me, so i thought it would be fun to put Harry and Draco there too.


Disclaimer: I own none of this. They're all J.K's..lucky bitch...  
  
Walking through the tube station in East London, two rather familiar looking boys stroll peacefully hand in hand, blissfully unaware of the frantic rush hour commotion around them...or not. Holding each other for dear life and trying not to get washed into a cabin and end up in god knows where is more realistic.  
  
"Harry! Where the hell are we?! I thought you said we were going to muggle London, not a bloody zoo! Ew that one just touched me..I think I might need to scrub for a week." The blond said as he sneered indignantly at 'the one who touched him', which happened to be a small child who was now running away screaming.  
  
"God lighten up Draco, its only the tube station" The brunette replied cheerfully.  
  
"So tell me again why the hell I am in this god forsaken hell hole, darling?" Draco said sulkily.  
  
"Because, as I keep telling you, we need to get Herm her pressie and we can't get it anywhere else. Now we hurry up if we want to get back to the hotel room and use the facilities of the jet stream spa." Harry said, with a wicked grin.  
  
Running quickly to catch the a taxi outside the station, Harry thought he heard Draco mumble something like 'bloody mudblood, last time I get her a present' and 'more important things to do with my energy', but he decided to leave it as Draco looked in a particularly bad mood. As soon as they got in the taxi, however, his mood quickly changed and before long he was staring out the window watching everything around him. "And the do all this without magic?" "Yes Draco, its called electricity, say it with me again ELECTRICITY." "Eleticity, wow."  
  
Before long they had reached their destination, a small shop called Forbidden Planet written on it with tacky pink and purple lettering and a cartoon Saturn as a logo. Inside the shop, it was filled to brimming point with small figurines of comic book and movie characters, movie posters, comic books, masks, full costumes and other movie toys and knick-knacks. Draco looked around uncertain of what to make of the place, but found his courage and picked up one of the toys, but quickly set it down again when he hit its sound button and it promptly growled at him.  
  
"C'mon help me find a yoda!" Harry yelled to him from the Star Wars section of the shop. Draco quickly made his way down to him but as he got there stopped, looked puzzled and turned to Harry.  
  
"Sweetie? What the fuck is Star Wars?" He asked sweetly. "Oh shit that's right, you probably haven't seen the movie." Harry replied. "Um honey, what's a movie?" Draco asked, confused. "You know a film, with actors, on a screen, telling a story?" "Never heard of one. So your telling me people sit in a screen and tell a story, seems a bit boring to me." "No they act it out" "Ah!" Draco said, pretending he knew what the hell Harry was on about. "So what's Star Wars, and what's a yoda?" "It's a film about space and space ships, and Yoda is a character out of it. He's really smart and wise and kicks some ass apparently in the latest film. Its Herm's favourite movie and Yoda's her favourite character, I think she secretly wants to be him, so were going to get her a Yoda for her birthday, hence us being in a movie merchandise shop." Harry explained.  
  
"Oh right ok." Draco said, hoping it would shut him up and stop confusing him more. He was disliking this confusing shop quite rapidly, and in order to get out of there quickly, decided he would help Harry find the elusive Yoda quickly, so he started moving along the shelves, lifting objects as he went.  
  
"Harry is this a Yoda?" Holding something up for Harry to inspect. "No Draco, that's a Darth Vader mask." "Harry is this a Yoda?" looking something small and brown. "No Draco, that's a Princess Leia wig." "Harry, Is this a Yoda?" Brandishing a light sabre, and waving it round. "No Draco, that's a light sabre, but lets get it, it might be fun later." "Harry is this a Yoda?" Poking something beside him. "No Draco, that's a sales assistant." "Oh." "And stop poking him." "Oh, ok."  
  
"Ah ha!" came from Harry at the back of the shop ten minutes later, brandishing a hip high cardboard cut out. Turning it round to let Draco see, he was disappointed by the look of dullness on Draco's face. "What, are you not impressed?" Harry pouted, "Took me bloody ages to find."  
  
"Well Harry love, it kinda looks like a picture of a wrinkly old house elf, and if you had have told me that before we could have gotten Herm a real one, we just retired Squatty, our house elf cause he was too old and we could have given him to her." Draco said in an unimpressed voice.  
  
"Oh god Draco, its not a bloody house elf, and since Herm's head of S.P.E.W., it's a tad doubtful she would want a wrinkly house elf anyway, and even if she wasn't, its still doubtful she would want a wrinkly house elf." Harry vented.  
  
"Oh well I was only trying to be nice, and helpful" Draco said in a voice like he was about to cry.  
  
"Baby, I'm sorry!" Harry said as he rushed to comfort Draco. "I didn't mean to shout at you, please forgive me!"  
  
"Ok", Draco sniffled, "but can we go home now." He said looking at Harry with pleading eyes.  
  
"No problem, just let me pay for this and we can go back to the hotel room and I promise I'll make it up to you." Harry said in a 'cooey' voice.  
  
"Thank you Harry." Draco said in his little boy voice.  
  
Harry quickly paid for the cut out and hurried out of the shop behind Draco. He expected a quiet ride home with a sulky Draco, but as soon as they were outside, Draco lit up a cig, took a long draw, turned to Harry and said in his drawl "Now were out of there I think I hear a certain spa calling." Immediately Harry forgot to be angry with Draco playing him and on hearing that lust filled voice, haled a taxi and clambered in as quickly as he could. Only when they were half way to the hotel, did he remember he'd left the friggin Yoda on the pavement outside the shop, but those thoughts were quickly lost by less innocent ones, provoked by Draco's wicked little tongue poking every crevice of his mouth.  
  
A/N: Supposedly a one off, but ill let the readers decide. Also I know it's a bit shite, but it is alas based on an actual experience that I had when my friend decided to buy a Yoda cut out for her boyfriend for Christmas, it was comical. 


End file.
